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Mail-in pants cleaning

America, are you ready to mail me your pants?

You wear pants. Eventually they get dirty. You could wash them yourself.

Or you could put them in a box and mail them to me.

I'm finding out how many people think that's completely ridiculous and how many immediately want the address. Both groups are welcome.

Tell Me About Your Pants Wait. Is This Real?

Not open for orders yet. Shipping separate. Shorts, never.

A vintage coin laundry sign hanging against a blue sky

Welcome to I Wash Pants

Yes, this is real.

I Wash Pants is a mail-in laundry service for exactly one kind of garment. You send me pants. I wash them, or have them professionally cleaned if that's what they need. I send them back.

That's the whole service. I've looked for ways to make it more complicated, and I don't think it needs them.

Right now I'm not taking orders. I'm finding out whether enough people want this before I buy more washing machines. The FAQ is where most people stop laughing and start asking about turnaround times.

Tell Me About Your Pants

Why would anyone do this?

Because you can.

I'm not going to pretend mailing your pants across the country is financially optimal. It's pants, in a box, going somewhere to be cleaned by someone who cares about them more than is strictly necessary. Some people will find that useful. Some will find it funny. Both are perfectly good reasons to own clean pants.

  • You hate laundry
  • Your building's machines
  • You travel
  • You're busy
  • Expensive denim
  • Dry-clean-only trousers
  • Workwear
  • You're particular
  • It's funny
I'm Curious

What I Wash

Your pants have needs.

Some pants go in a washing machine. Some apparently require chemistry, specialized equipment and the blessings of three generations of textile professionals. I’ll deal with those too. They’ll just cost more.

Denim jeans hanging on a rail, shot with shallow focusEveryday Pants

Jeans

Washed cold and inside out so the color stays where it belongs. Dried gently. Nobody shrinks.

A person wearing grey dress pantsEveryday Pants

Dress Pants & Slacks

Machine-washable trousers, washed properly and pressed along the crease they came with.

A person wearing soft grey sweatpantsEveryday Pants

Sweatpants & Joggers

Inside out, low heat, no pilling. They come back soft enough to justify never changing.

A mechanic in work pants working under a large vehicleEveryday Pants

Work Pants

Canvas, duck and cargo. Heavy soil pre-treated. Grease dealt with separately and seriously.

Wooden clothes hangers on a railSpecial Pants

Dry-Clean-Only

Wool, silk, rayon and anything lined. Professionally cleaned by the method the label asks for.

A pair of bright red pants laid on a white wooden surfaceSpecial Pants

Specialty & Costume

Sequins, embellishments, unusual construction and pants you can’t explain. Handled with care.

What counts as pants

What is a pant?

For operational purposes, I have been forced to establish a definition.

pants (n., pl.) · /pants/

A garment worn below the waist that extends below the knee.

If it covers your lower half and continues past your knee, there's a strong chance I'm willing to wash it.

Pants

  • Jeans
  • Chinos
  • Dress pants
  • Slacks
  • Sweatpants
  • Joggers
  • Leggings
  • Work pants
  • Cargo pants
  • Overalls
  • and more

Not pants

  • Shorts
  • Underwear

Shorts are not pants. Underwear is absolutely not pants. This is not negotiable.

Read the full ruling, including capris

The knee test A pair of pants drawn in outline. A dashed line marks the knee. A dashed orange outline of shorts stops above the knee and is labeled not pants. The full-length pants continue below the knee and qualify. KNEE WAIST SHORTS STOP HERE PANTS CONTINUE

Steps

How it works.

Ordering isn’t open yet. When it is, this is what happens.

  1. 1

    Place an order

    Tell me what’s coming and anything I should know.

  2. 2

    Mail your pants

    Any sturdy box. You pay to ship them here.

  3. 3

    I wash them

    Label read, pockets checked, cleaned properly.

  4. 4

    They come home

    Folded or pressed and mailed back. You pay return.

All eight steps, in detail

Pricing, tentatively

What it costs.

Two kinds of pants, one discount for bringing friends. Shipping is separate and paid by you, both ways.

Everyday Pants

 

$10 per pair

For pants that go in a washing machine without complaint.

  • Care label read, actually
  • Pockets checked
  • Washed at the temperature the label asks for
  • Dried the way the fabric prefers
  • Reasonable stain treatment
I Own These
Popular idea

Pants Like Company

3+ pairs per order

10% off

Pants travel better in groups. Send three or more pairs in one box and the cleaning is discounted.

  • 10% off cleaning on 3+ pairs
  • Mix Everyday and Special Pants
  • One box, one trip to the post office
  • Counts toward the loyalty offer
Count Me In

Special Pants

Starting at

$25 per pair

For pants with needs. Dry clean only, delicate, structured, or complicated.

  • Everything in Everyday
  • Professional dry cleaning or wet cleaning as required
  • Pressing where the garment calls for it
  • Extra handling for linings, pleats and trims
  • Price confirmed before cleaning if it runs higher
See Details

Tentative pricing. I am still testing these numbers, which is partly what the form is for. Shipping is separate and always paid by you, in both directions. The pants contribute nothing financially.

The Loyalty Offer

Wash 10 pairs. Get the next 5 at 50% off.

They're already off. They might as well be half off.

Discounts apply to cleaning, not shipping. Full offer rules will be published before launch.

Pants education

Read the label. I do.

Every pair of pants came with instructions, sewn in, in a language nobody taught you. Here’s the short version. Every pair I wash gets the long version.

The tub

Washing. Dots are the maximum water temperature: one is cold, two is warm, three is hot. A hand means hand wash. An X means keep it out of water.

The triangle

Bleach. Empty means any bleach. Diagonal lines mean oxygen bleach only. Crossed out means none, ever.

The square

Drying. A circle inside means the dryer, with dots for heat. Lines instead mean hang it, drip it or lay it flat.

The iron

Pressing. One dot for synthetics, two for wool and silk, three for cotton and linen. Crossed out means it will melt.

The circle

Professional cleaning. The letter inside tells a dry cleaner which solvent is safe. W means professional wet cleaning.

Everything else

Shrinkage, fading, stretch fabrics, dry-clean-only, and why your black pants are turning grey. It's all in The Pants Department.

Read the full care label guideBrowse all pants advice

What you get

Besides clean pants.

  • One less loadSpecifically the heavy one. Jeans are why laundry baskets are hard to lift.
  • Someone who reads the labelEvery pair, every time. Including the tiny symbols.
  • The right waterCold for dark denim, warm where it actually helps, never a guess.
  • Careful dryingLow heat or no heat. Shrinkage is not a service I offer.
  • Pressing where it belongsCrisp dress pants. Uncreased jeans, unless you insist.
  • A storyYou mailed your pants to someone. People are going to ask.

Testimonials

What customers say.

I sent him pants. Later, pants came back clean. I have very little else to add.
Dana WhitfieldColumbus, OH · 3 pairs
Before this, I washed my own pants. Now I don’t. Civilization continues to advance.
Marcus DelgadoTucson, AZ · 5 pairs
I asked if he’d also wash a pair of shorts. He would not. I respect it more than I expected to.
Priya RamanRaleigh, NC · 2 pairs
My jeans have now been to more states than I have.
Tom KowalskiMilwaukee, WI · 1 pair, well traveled
They came back folded better than when I bought them. I’ve decided not to think about what that says about me.
Renee CastilloSan Antonio, TX · 6 pairs
I told my friends. They asked if it was real. I said yes. I’m still not completely sure.
Greg AlbrightSpokane, WA · 4 pairs

These customers are made up, because the business hasn't opened yet. The pants are hypothetical too. Disclosure.

The Pants List

Tell me about your pants.

This is probably the first time a website has asked you that.

About two minutes, in three short parts. No payment. No commitment. No obligation to ever mail me anything. Your answers decide whether I Wash Pants launches, where it starts, and what it charges.

Joining The Pants List gets you:

  • A launch notification
  • Early access when ordering opens
  • Introductory offers and future promotions
  • A shot at Founding Pants status, defined before launch
Part oneYou

Tells me where the pants are. Nothing more sinister.

Part twoYour pants

How many pairs would you realistically send at once?

What kind of pants are we dealing with? Choose all that apply.

Part threeYour intentions

How often would you realistically use a service like this?

What would you reasonably expect to pay per pair for washing, not including shipping?

Be honest. This is the question that decides the most.

Adds you to The Pants List: launch notification, early access and introductory offers by email. Unsubscribe anytime. I don't sell your information. See the Privacy Policy. Leave this unchecked if you only want to answer the questions.

Questions

You have questions. Reasonably.

The FAQ is where this website stops being a joke and starts being a business. There are 43 questions. Most are real.

Is this real?

Yes.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, this is a real business. It isn't taking orders yet, because I'm first finding out how many people actually want to mail me their pants. If that number turns out to be more than zero, I start washing.

You seriously want people to mail you their pants?

That is the entire business model.

I've read it back several times. It doesn't get less strange, but it does keep making sense.

Why wouldn't I just wash my own pants?

You absolutely can.

This website does not represent an intervention. It's an option, for people who would rather not, or who own pants they're nervous about, or who simply enjoy the idea of their jeans taking a trip.

What counts as pants?

A garment worn below the waist that extends below the knee.

This definition has already consumed more legal thought than anticipated. The full ruling, with edge cases, lives on the What Is a Pant? page.

Do you wash shorts?

No.

They had their chance to become pants and stopped early.

How much does it cost?

Tentatively, Everyday Pants are $10 a pair and Special Pants start at $25 a pair. Shipping is separate. These numbers are still being tested, so they may change before launch. See pricing.

Who pays shipping?

You pay to send the pants.

You also pay for the pants to come home.

The pants contribute nothing financially.

Read the Full FAQ

The Pants Department

Latest pants advice.

Written in the same voice, fact-checked more carefully than the jokes.

How Often Should You Wash Jeans?

on /Denim/3 min read

Less often than you wash a shirt, more often than a certain corner of the internet insists. Here is how to tell when it’s time.

How to Read a Care Label

on /Care Labels/3 min read

Five shapes, a handful of dots and lines, and one small tag that knows more about your pants than you do.

Why Some Pants Say Dry Clean Only

on /Specialty Care/3 min read

Your trousers are not being dramatic. Some fabrics really do change permanently in water. Here’s which ones, and why.

All Articles

Your pants are waiting.

Probably on a chair. Tell me about them, and I’ll tell you when I start washing.

Tell Me About Your Pants